Creating an Intentional Network with Mel Sanchez

This week, Mel Sanchez joins the pod to tell us how she likes to approach new work relationships and how she has made the often daunting idea of “networking” within the entertainment industry in Los Angeles work for her.

You can stay connected with Mel via her LinkedIn and Instagram @melsanstagram.

Make sure to subscribe to Hold the Door on your favorite listening platform. You can also get updates on guests, episode releases, and more by following the show on Instagram @holdthedoorpod.

Transcript

Camille: Recording again. 

Mel: When? 

Camille: Right now. 

Mel: Oh, okay. 

Sorry, let me take that one again

I just thought we laughed too much for you to use the first one.

Camille: okay, we'll cut that so you don't get arrested.

Mel: That's how I catastrophize. Sorry, is that what you asked? 

The way one minute of this podcast is usable.

Camille: Hello. welcome back to Hold the Door. I'm your host, Camille Wilson. This week, Mel Sanchez joins to discuss creating an intentional network. You'll learn how she likes to approach new work relationships and how she has made the often daunting idea of networking within the entertainment industry in Los Angeles work for her.

Hope you enjoy our conversation.

Hailing from Chicago, Mel Sanchez is a development executive for a comedy studio working across both film and TV. As a first generation American, her mission is to normalize the POC voice in comedy and create hilarious but heartfelt content with widespread appeal.

Hey. Hi, Mel. Hi.

Thank you for joining the podcast. You're welcome. I'm excited. Me too. I'm proud of you. Thank you. Okay, so today we're here to essentially talk about networking, but really I want to talk about one step past that, which is like, low key making friends. Uh huh. And um, I think you are uniquely good at creating like long lasting close relationships that originated in the workplace.

Mel: I'm gonna cry.

One second in. 

Camille: Get the tissues. Um, but it's also a choice and I think it's a choice that a lot of people from Underrepresented communities and backgrounds either struggle to make or like, don't know how to make, like, don't know what things to consider. And so, the industry is all about who you know, but I think usually folks are thinking about like hierarchy and nepotism, but it really is like, so essential to have a strong support system around you.

To survive in the industry, but also just in the city of Los Angeles. 

Mel: Yeah, especially because Like so many people I've met I'm not from here. And so having no like family foundation here it it becomes a survival Like you need to have people that are your chosen family. Totally. Um, so that LA Feels like home.

Camille: Yeah. 

Mel: Sorry. Somebody is sawing something in my front yard, I guess.

Camille: It's going to be, it's part of the LA experience. Um, but yeah, speaking of the LA experience, I feel like the two top things I hear people complain about are the traffic and not being able to find a community like, Oh, everyone's fake or whatever.

And so basically I'm hoping this episode will help people. Just kind of like maybe have a different perspective or see like how you've been able to be successful. Especially in a space where you're like, are they using 

me? Yeah. Am I using them? Yeah. So anyway, that's over here. Okay. Amazing. Um, so we've heard your professional bio and then now we'll hear your personal logline.

Okay. and then you can read it. 

Mel: Do I have to know it? 'cause I forgot. 

Camille: You don't, you don't have to memorize

Mel: Oh wait, I have it. I have it. Okay. Um. Okay, I'm a Latina pop culture academic who likes to laugh, loves to cry, and is always on the hunt for things that make me do both.

I love that actually. Thank you. And I think it's accurate. Yeah, I genuinely think that there's a level of academia to pop culture and like having an understanding of, like truly I think someone could tell me any name in like the pop culture sphere and I'll be able to talk to them about something that they just did.

Yeah. Um. I don't know. I just like always took so much comfort in pop culture my whole life. 

Camille: And we're gonna get there. Yeah. Okay. So actually we can kind of start with that now. So how did you get your start in the industry and Was entertainment always the plan? 

Mel: Yeah. So I was always a ham growing up.

Like I'd always be like, okay, how can I make the group of people in front of me laugh or what can I do? And I would always put on shows, you know, the classic living room show where you get your cousins to learn a choreography and then you're like, everybody sit, we have something for you. Um, so that was like, I always did that.

And then we got like a camera and I would always make shorts with my cousins. And I have, I just found so many of them. So it's really cute to see, you can hear me be like, Oh, can you say that again? Or I'll be like, um, actually, so I'm going to move you. And me, like literal director, um, and so I always knew that I loved one, getting people together and making something.

Like I loved. And you and I have talked about this too. Like I love organized choreography, like dance videos. I will watch them for hours. Um, and so I would fully have my cousins learning dance routines and 

Camille: they are the best. Yeah. 

Mel: Yeah. And they really are. There's, there's some, yeah, I just literally my Tik TOK, if I find two, then I'm like, okay, the rest of the day, my Tik TOK is dance videos.

Um, but so I was just doing that all the time. And it wasn't until like. High school where I realized that it's a job, you know When you have that moment where you're like wait I could actually like do this because when I was younger I would be like I want to be like adam sandler when I grow up because all I knew was like I see him in movies He's really funny.

It was like adam sandler and eddie murphy Two idols growing up. I was like I need to be a combination of both of them somehow as a woman and a latina like I really found, I saw myself in them. And, um, yeah, I just like, I was really drawn to the. Um, comedy world in general, um, and, you know, having, uh, immigrant parents, they, didn't always, like, understand, I mean, my mom, I shouldn't say that, both my parents grew up here, but they're not from here, but they are very American, but there's still some like, Nuance things that my dad in particular doesn't necessarily understand about comedy because it's so niche and I feel like our Relationship with both my parents got so much deeper when I brought them into this world of stuff because my dad He, he showed me movies, and like, he's where I get, my dad watches like two movies every single day.

Camille: Wow. 

Mel: I know. And they're the worst, like, if you could think of like, something that has like 2 percent on Rotten Tomatoes, my dad has seen it. he is obsessed, that man loves a bad movie. And so, um, Just like with my parents always being so supportive and, you know, when you have a parent who's an immigrant, there's just like this level of understanding of like, I have sacrificed X, Y, Z, so that you don't have to think about what you want to do with your career.

You have this world as your oyster. Um, and so, my parents were always supportive of me, doing something in entertainment. But they just kind of didn't know what like they would always be like She's gonna be on SNL or like like, you know when your parents just have no understanding of what you do they'd be like she's gonna be an actress and I'd be like, no, I am not

But not better notice not better than Adam Sandler Eddie Murphy, but they'd be like, yeah, she's gonna be An actress and they'd be like, she's a writer. And then for a while it was like, she's gonna be on the news. That was a big one. My uncles too. They'd be like, she's gonna be like a sports broadcaster.

She's gonna say the weather on the news. And I was like, no, I'm like, they were like, we just know she's gonna be somewhere on screen. That's all we need to know. Um, which is so crazy. She's famous. I'm not. Um, but, uh, then. When I went to college, I was looking at broadcast media schools because I was like, yeah, I guess I could go into like radio or something like that.

I just, I can talk, obviously. So, um, then that quickly turned into I ended up accidentally ending up at a school with a really good film program, um, and my parents were like, a little scared about me going to university and then doing film, so I did it all as my minors, and my actual degree is in, media and business, so that was always like, that was their like, She's technically a business major.

Right. But it's like, no, I'm taking a standup comedy class. And then my school had this program where if you wanted to work in entertainment, you could finish your senior year in LA and they helped you have night class. And where I took night class is where I work now, as an exec in the same building.

I know. Um, but so I finished school here. I did internships. And then, like, five months after being in L. A., I got, um, I graduated. And before I graduated, I got a job at a talent agency. And also, degrees are so important, and I really believe in college and furthering your education. I love school. But they didn't even know that I hadn't graduated.

I, like, got this job, and then I worked for a whole month, and then I said, Hi, I need a week off to go graduate. And they were like, What? 

They were like, What are you talking about? And I was like, No, like, if you noticed, it said graduating this year.

And And they were like, oh, huh, okay, sure, have a good graduation. So then I was like, wow, everything that I did, I could have just come here. Um, but it's fine because I wouldn't have ended up in LA. I don't think there was any scenario where my parents would have been supportive of me moving 2000 miles away if it wasn't like, it's a school trip.

Fair. I'll come back. Yeah. Never came back. So yeah, then I worked at an agency and then from an agency I went to um, a streamer and I floated for a while and then I ended up on a comedy desk there. I really liked it, but we were focused on stand up and I wanted to expand my breadth of knowledge in comedy. And at this point I had only really worked on stand up in a professional sense because at the agency I also was on a stand up comedy desk.

So I like was like, I'm so siloed in this one part of the industry. I really want to expand because I don't necessarily want this part of the industry to be my career. Um, so then I went to a studio as old as time. One of the first ever, um, it's a big one. I'm not going to say what it is, but I did not like it there at all.

And I think it was, it had mostly to do with coming from a streamer to then going to an old studio. It's like totally, I was like, What do you mean I can't talk in a meeting? And they were like, assistants don't. And I was like, oh, okay, sorry. And then I would be like, oh, I read the script. I can send you some thoughts.

And they'd be like, um, no need.

Camille: They're like, how'd you get a hold of that?

Mel: No, I was like, yeah, they were like, didn't realize you were on that email. Um, and so, there was just a lot of, office politics too, and I was the newest assistant, um, in like two years, and some of them had been there like four or five years, and they were just waiting for anything, and they're still there.

I emailed one of them recently to meet with my old boss, and the people setting it were still people that I had worked with before. In 2022. And so I just, because I felt like I didn't start there early enough, I was like, maybe if I had started here, only worked here and got up, that would be good.

But there's no path forward here for me. Yeah. And it's not for like eight years. Yeah. And so, and that was on the scripted comedy team. So I was finally able to be with scripts and watch them talk to showrunners. And it really affirmed like, Oh, I love this because it's so much, I don't know. I think I'm particularly good at comforting someone.

And the job of a development exec is so much comforting. Because it's like a studio will call you and say, Oh, sorry, can I swear? Yeah, you can.

They'll be like, we hate this script. Why did, we don't want to work with this writer. They suck. We entered this deal and this is just not what we paid for. And then it's like, I'm so sorry. You know what? I can see that. I understand. I'm gonna talk to the writer and we will have something back.

What's a good deadline for you? And immediately, kind of turning it around and being like, how can we accommodate you? Mhm. And then taking all that anger and frustration they have with the writing to the writer, who has been so vulnerable and so many times it's like they've put their life to paper and there's so much about the script that is like, well, this is my story.

If they don't like it, then it's me they don't like. And so it so quickly can become a fight. And so you take all that information, you go back to the writer and you're like, you know, I think they're just realizing that the studio's direction is changing. And, you know, it's really frustrating for them and for me, because you've put so much time into this and we know, there's so much value in this story.

And that's why I want to get it right. Because I want to get this made. And so it's like. You're playing both sides. But it's always, and I think I, I'm always in favor of the creative I'm working with. that is the most important part because I think there are so many stories that have been made that aren't good.

Yeah. So taking the time to like really believe and champion a writer is what I want to make my life's work. And I think kind of the studio side, they're answering to most of the time an international or global audience. Especially like streamers. It's like, well, if that doesn't have an international play, then it doesn't matter.

But there's so much that doesn't like comedy. Comedy is so niche. It's so domestic. So I don't know. I, I, I don't know how I got to talking about this.

Camille: But actually that was a good breakdown of, um, Kind of like what a day in the life of a development exec is. Yeah, 

Mel: so we can put that somewhere else. But then from the studio, I went to go work for an actress and that was really fun. I was a creative exec for her and it was a lot of just packaging scripts with writers or like her production company.

Yes, so it would be like If there was a writer she really liked, but the studio that we were working with was like, she's too young. It would be my job to go and find an older writer or a writer that has like a little bit more of seniority in the industry and pair them and then bring it back to the studio and be like, do you like it now?

It's a lot of, okay, what if we did this? Yeah. What about now? Problem solving. It's so much problem solving. I'm a huge puzzle person. Most of my breaks are just me doing different types of puzzles, especially like a logic puzzle. I love logic puzzles so much. Those grid ones. Yes! Yeah, that's the best.

Uh, and like New York Times games. New York Times games are my favorite. Um, so many good, good, good games on that app. Um, it's worth the 40 a year. 

Camille: Oh, before you said it, I was like, we need to have a talk. I need games. You're like, there's so many online that are free. Like, I'll send you a link. Um, okay. 40 a year.

Okay. 

Mel: Yeah. So then, um, I ended up getting let go from that job because the studio Um, didn't renew her deal. So we had a first look deal at a studio and they didn't renew it, um, just cause they cut like 65 deals. Oh wow. Yeah, so we were just part of a mass exodus, unfortunately. Um, and then I was unemployed for five months and, uh, the first three, maybe four, I didn't do anything.

I didn't even look. I didn't look. I didn't look. 

Camille: I didn't look. You're 

Mel: retired for a little bit. I was like, I'm, maybe I'm just done. I just want to hang out. And, at that point, my partner had a fairly good, high paying job, so I was like, maybe I can just chill for a little. And he was like, um, I don't know about that.

He's like, I'm not really making that much money. And I was like, yes, but compared to my zero dollars. Like, yeah, let's think about this in relative terms. Um, and so, uh, I took a few months off and then I landed this job. I kind of, it was kind of crazy. We don't need to keep any of this in, but they were looking for an assistant.

And then I negotiated my way into being a coordinator because I was like, actually, I think your company has a lack of,

this. Just in my interview process this is what I've seen. It's just advice. Like, no big deal if you're like, what? And then they were like, okay. Didn't hear from them for like three days.

I was like, well, what's wrong with me? You can't go to an interview and be like, hey, thanks for this opportunity. Can I tell you what's wrong about your company? Um, Which is just I don't know, I was just being crazy. And then they were like, Hey, so we thought about it. You're right. Can you start Monday?

And I was like, um, sure. 

Camille: Yeah. 

Mel: And then a month in, I just started doing all, I just started leading everything. Um, and then they were like, okay, we're going to promote you to being an exec. 

Camille: So that's awesome. Yeah. That's awesome that they saw your potential so quickly and rewarded it. Yeah. Um, and also it's funny because when you're like, oh, why would I go and tell them what they're doing wrong?

Mm-Hmm. , I interviewed for whatever that like, Buzzfeed. Oh yeah. Internship was like back in the day and probably my senior year of college. So I went to the interview, I like, think it's going well. I did my little articles and stuff. Mm-Hmm. . And then toward the end of the interview, they're like, okay, so like, what would you change?

Like what could we improve? And I was like, oh. Um, I think you're doing a great job. Like, I have no, like, suggestions or anything. 

Mel: Well, that's a hard question to ask someone in an interview. Yeah, 

Camille: but I wasn't, like, prepared. Yeah. Because I'm like, obviously, they're asking, what can you bring? And I'm like, nothing.

It's perfect. Like, 

Mel: you guys are doing so well. Are you sure you need to build this position? 

Camille: And I just, like, in the moment, I was like, I'm complimenting them like this is what they want to hear not realizing the question is like, yeah Why should we bring you in to help us? So I think you did a good thing 

Mel: Thank you Um, but yeah now i'm here That was only I think about 45 minutes, but that's my life story Um, i'm so sorry you'll have to cut that down a 

Camille: lot we'll see we'll see okay, so You Kind of perfect because you talked about a bunch of different places.

So when you enter like a new space or a new job. What's like your strategy? Are you like, I'm introducing myself to everyone or you're like, I'm gonna be quiet, sit here, see what the vibes are, see who likes who, who doesn't like who. And then I'll go in. 

Mel: Yeah. So I eventually, my whole life's journey will lead to me playing survivor and winning 

Camille: just for the listener.

She's speaking literally about 

Mel: survivor. CBS is survivor hosted by Jeff probes. Um, I am very much, when I come into a new space, I will kind of try to be as, not small, but, like you said, kind of in the background a bit, so I could see all of like the natural. Relationships, if I'm at like a big group dinner, a lot of times if I'm a person being brought to the dinner, I'll try to speak as little as possible.

Um, but as soon as I kind of feel like I understand, based off of one person's reaction to something or a topic being, you know, really talked chiming in, then I'll be like, okay, now I kind of get it. The next time that I hear a topic I'm interested in, I'll give my opinion on how to 

Camille: tackle it. 

Mel: So I'm very much like, my mom always said, I'm like a mirror.

And so, I think my behavior is really informed by, who I'm with or what I'm in front of. Um. And so, yeah, I just try to kind of see , who is, I kind of let people show me who they are, and also, the trash takes itself out. 

So, 

Mel: like, if I hear, I, kind of let somebody talk a lot, and if I'm like, oh, I don't really vibe with them, then I will just not really talk to them.

I'm not good at, like, playing nice. I don't think I'm a nice person, but I think I'm very kind. And so I don't, I'm not like, I'm not gonna go out of my way, which I've been told by people is like not a good way to be in the industry. But I'm also like, but I don't want to work with bad people. So it's if me, Not talking to someone means, well, any future business with them, you can kiss that goodbye.

I'm like, I don't want future business with them. I don't like them. Yeah. What's what's not clicking. Yeah. I don't care. 

Camille: That totally makes sense. Yeah. Um, sort of a little bit on that note. So I think. One thing that I'm kind of trying to get at with this podcast is like, folks like you are like, not only surviving, but thriving in an industry and environment that wasn't made for you, or like for them.

And so I think especially coming from like, first generation or like immigrant parents, or like, even just any background of color, even if you've been in this country for.

Mel: I'm actually 200. Yeah. 

Camille: If you've been in this country for so long and your ancestors have been here for a minute, I think a lot of the instinct is like, separate work and personal, don't show up messy, don't say that at work, you can do that at home, like, basically check yourself at the door. And so I think that kind of mentality then eventually like applies to the relationship, so it's like, People at work will only get to know you so well and you don't do anything outside of work.

And I think naturally in the industry it blurs a little bit because of like work drinks and networking and all that. But do you agree with this separation at all? And then, how do you approach work relationships?

Mel: I definitely subscribe to the separation when it comes to like, people that aren't at peer level.

So if I meet someone at work, we're the same age, we're like the same position, like you and I when we met, I was just like, Oh, I'll tell her anything for sure. Like, uh, the, it's, If I can, find common ground with someone, I realize I like them, then I will pursue, a relationship outside of work. And a lot of times that comes from us both being like, oh, I love that, and then you make a plan to go do that or go watch that thing.

Um, and so, not to bring this back to Survivor, but, but actually that's me auditioning. Me auditioning, yeah. My Survivor watch group, like, the people that watch. There have been multiple people have found jobs from coming to watch Survivor or have made friends or have ended up Meeting somebody that they really like like like we've made so many cool Genuine connections that have nothing to do with the work that we do.

Camille: Mm hmm 

Mel: It's just I love this show and then it's like, oh my god, wait, you're so cool. You're a writer My company has a room opening up. I bet we could like get you an interview You And, right now, one of my friends is, it's her first time being a writer's assistant in a comedy room, and that is from the Survivor watch group.

So, it's, you'll have to track all the connections. I know, I need to start writing this stuff down. Yeah. Um, but I think that's like at the peer level, I definitely, do not show up to work, with all of the stuff, like, outside. It'll come up if it's like I meet someone and I really like them. But at work, with supervisors or people below or above, I hate saying that, but like, if there's admin underneath me, they won't have access to who I am.

They will have access to me and my personality, as far as like at work, I'll talk to them about anything that they're interested in talking about. But I try to draw really clear lines of, this isn't the relationship that I want to, I want our relationship to be professional because in the situation where if it's like an assistant that's working on my team, I want them to see me as a professional, ally that they have, I don't want them to be like, This is my friend, if that makes sense.

And that's not to say I will never act as a friend to them. It's just that I don't want them to have that access to me. Just like, I don't want my bosses to give me that access to them because I don't want them to be my friend. Like there have been times where supervisors at work have been like.

Do you want to go to this thing together that is not work related? And I will just be like, I don't think I can, I have this, like I always try to have something else to do instead. Yeah, but you won't say, because we're 

Camille: not in the same room. Yeah, 

Mel: no, exactly. Um. 

Camille: You don't have access to me. 

Mel: No. Which is so crazy, why did I say it like that?

But it's true, like I don't, there's a wall up in a sense of like, I want our relationship to help each other professionally, because. I don't know. I never want, something to be blurred or for someone to think that, we can just mess around at work. I don't know. I'm very, I like to work a lot.

I love, I love work. I want work to stay work. So that when I'm having fun, I feel like I've earned having fun with my friends. Which is, I don't know, that's a me thing. I always feel like I have to earn having fun. The fun, random things in life. Yeah. But I can't do that. If work is also people trying to be friends and have fun.

Cause then I'm like, I'm not being fulfilled professionally. Yeah. I'm like, what's going on? There's too much good.

Camille: Okay. That might be another conversation. 

Mel: No, that will, let me just write that down for therapy. Yeah. 

Camille: Put that on the list. But no, I get that. Yeah. Yeah. I also value work and I want to work. And so I do get like wanting to show up and accomplish something. 

Mel: Yeah. 

Camille: And then when those lines get blurred, sometimes the work also gets blurred.

Mel: I don't do work drinks either. I never have. Even when I started. 

Camille: That's shocking, actually. 

Mel: I know. I'm like, what? Yeah, no, I like, I will go to work dinner, which obviously, we'll have a drink or two at that, but I don't do, like. But there's food involved. Yeah, I know, I'm like eating an app, that's fine. Um, no, I don't do work drinks.

I've never done that. I have, I can count all of the drinks I've done. On one hand. Wow. And for like, from 2020, I mean, COVID, no one was getting drinks, but to 2024, I had drinks once on zoom. So like, I wasn't even drinking. Who set that up? I want to say I'm really good friends with them still. It was with Raina and Kristen.

I don't know if you've met them, but they come to Survivor. Um, but it was literally my one and, they're amazing. We're still friends, but. I don't, I very quickly into getting into the industry, I realized like I would set drinks or I would kind of do what they would say at an agency. Like, you need to be out at drinks every night.

You need to be talking to this assistant, this assistant, whatever. networking the right way. Yes, and there's a way to do it, quote unquote. Right. And I would always feel so anxious if I knew I had drinks a night. And You know, those were getting cancelled left and right. I was not going to drinks. 

Camille: You're like, I do have drinks set every night.

Mel: That doesn't mean I'm going. No, but I quickly realized, this sucks. This is so shitty. Why am I like, don't swear. You can if you want. I know. You can 

Camille: censor if you want. But you're allowed to 

Mel: speak freely. This is so shitty of me, I'm wasting this person's time, I know I don't want to do this, I know I'm not going to be comfortable.

Because I just don't like, I don't like that. 

Camille: Yeah. 

Mel: Um, and Wait, 

Camille: so, if I were someone that you didn't super know, and I was like, hey, do you want to have drinks? Would you say, um, would you rather have dinner or like ? 

Mel: Yeah. No, I think I would, I would say like, do you, do you have time for coffee or lunch? Okay.

Just not drink. Yes. Okay. I'm not like a let's go to a bar. Yeah. I just, I never liked that. Yeah. And 

Camille: it's extremely uncomfortable. It's like meeting strangers in a place you don't really know to have alcohol and a lot of times you don't have enough money to get the food. No , 

Mel: so then you're just No. Yeah.

That's another thing. I had no money. And I knew people at the agency I worked at that were going out every night and then they'd go out on the weekends with their friends. I barely had enough money to go out on the weekend and to feed myself with groceries that there was no I can spend eighteen dollars on a bad cocktail and sit with somebody that I probably I don't know what's gonna happen from this relationship.

I do think that they're so beneficial and I understand why that is so ingrained in the culture, but I just didn't do it. And I think I'm kind of realizing now as an exec, there are certain ways that it probably would have been helpful. I think it just, all of those people that I didn't do drinks with now are also execs or also like, are agents or are producers and, I think I probably know.

a third of the people I would know if I did do that. But I don't think that it's hindered me in my career because it's not like I was doing nothing. 

It was instead of drinks, I was going to a mixer that was set up by an organization that I was a part of or I liked, or I was going to a screening at a company I really liked, or, you know, we would do like a group dinner with another company or other people across departments.

So it was just I realized, two years into not doing drinks, I was like, all my friends know people, and I don't. 

Camille: Oh. That's not worked up. 

Mel: No, I was like, I realized, wait, this is probably not a great idea. So I need to find places and things that I like doing, and that's how I'll meet people. So I like, I think because.

It was okay because even though I wasn't doing what the industry was like, this is what you have to do. I was still trying to meet people, still meeting people, still going to events, still trying to get my name out there as much as I could. 

Camille: You still accomplished that end goal. 

Mel: Yeah.

Camille: But you made it work for you.

Mel: Yeah. And so I think that's something that the industry still is so stuck in its ways about like, this is the path to do this. This is the way to do that. Stay in your lane. Don't try to do two things at once. Be focused. I really kind of ignore that, because I'm like, no, I don't want to. I want to do everything I want to do.

What are you talking about? Um, like, I'm not here to do one thing. I think I love what I'm doing right now, but that doesn't mean that I never want to do something else. And, um, this job I'm doing now is kind of a means to an end where I'm Doing all of the things I want to do. You know, being like the weather, a weather cast person, being a sports broadcaster, director, choreographer.

Camille: Of course, can't forget choreographer. 

Mel: Yeah, well, it's, we're all, we're on the road to my EGOT. I'm ready. I have no letters. So far nothing. Yeah, you have the placeholders. Yeah. Yeah, I've made, I've put the shelves up. Um, but yeah, so I, I guess technically I've worked on something that has an E and something that has an O.

Hey. But they're not mine. That's. My name wasn't on it. That's halfway there. I would say. Yeah. You know what? You're right. Yeah. They need to make a Wikipedia page for people who. Loosely a part of.

Um, but yeah, so I think just my biggest advice for the networking thing or the networking side of things is to just show up in places that you feel you'll be your best self because Me not going to drinks probably hindered me in parts of my career but then taking that time and then making like a watch group for the show or, you know, getting really involved with this organization.

I showed up as my best self because I was happy to be in those spaces. 

Camille: Right. 

Mel: And all the connections that I made there were so much more genuine, and maybe not, sometimes I have, you know, there's tons of surface level relationships you make in the industry, but they're still so much more positive than the one I'm going to make when I'm like, I'm so anxious, I don't want to be here, I don't want to spend the money on this drink.

Camille: Yeah. Um, but I do want to talk about you kind of having this filter and gauge of like when you first Walk in the room and you're like, okay, I'm seeing who I can work with. And then also when you're putting yourself in spaces where you feel more comfortable So obviously there's a little bit of a filter there um But at the same time in the industry, you're constantly meeting new people You're working with people on different things , and so What are some of those signs you look for in a person that gives you kind of the okay to be like Okay, I can share a little bit more than I would with just like some random.

Yeah. Um, and have you ever had to like backtrack when you deem them as safe and then realize like, Oh, yeah, wrong classification. This is not a person I can work with. 

Mel: Yeah. So the first part, I think I can see a relationship or like friendship with somebody based off of, learning more about where they're from or like where they came from.

Because I feel like a lot of my foundation with friends is a shared identity or a shared, experience of growing up and a level of connection that's I feel like is further than work and career. Like you and I, as an example, when we met, I just, we kind of have a very similar like, I think the way that we worry about things is similar.

In a way where like 

Camille: So telling that you picked up on that immediately. 

Mel: And just talking to you, also I'm very drawn to sister people. Like Hold on. People that have sisters. 

Camille: I knew what you meant. 

Mel: Okay, cut.

Okay, so, I think when you told me that you had sisters, you didn't have brothers, I was like, oh. She's going to be one of my best friends. In, immediately. Yeah, because I feel like, a lot of my close girlfriends or people that I've met at work, they're largely sister girls, like girls that grew up having sisters.

There's a couple brothers that have snuck in there. I think it's just when you have a sister, you kind of are able to, a lot of like internalized misogyny that we learn as women is either easier to work through because it's like, yeah, I feel this way, but not about my sisters, are you crazy? And so it makes you kind of understand.

Immediately grow up with empathy for women and like an allyship toward women that I think Sometimes in situations where women don't have other women in their house growing up with them. They don't understand that as well Yeah, or it's something they learn later. That's really interesting So yeah, just think about it like think about your close friends and if they don't have a sister Wait a second.

I see that now.

Camille: Um, what about only children? 

Mel: Are they okay? That's different. That's different. Okay. That's all in the parents. Okay. I feel like when you have siblings, it's like you all are also raising each other with your parents. Yeah. Your parents are like the lampposts and then you're all out there like helping each other out.

But um, I don't know, I think when I realized like, oh, she has a sister or she has multiple sisters and. We have like shared anxiety. I was like, there's a level of understanding here that is deeper than work. Um, because there's and then also when you're like, my mom is Mexican. And I was like, mine is too.

Like, are you kidding me? Let's pack it up. Do you want to go to dinner? No, I was like, let's leave work.

Um, 

but that's like 

Mel: the story. If I think about any of my very close friends that came from work, it's a shared identity 

and you 

Mel: know, and it's, it could also just be like, we both like this show. Yeah. There's just something about, That relationship where there was something we went through or something we were a part of at the same time makes us able to have such a great relationship.

Like two of my newer friends that I've made that I've become really close with, they also ran One Direction, a One Direction fan account. And you say also because I ran a One Direction fan account. And so it was kind of big, right? Yeah. It was 

Camille: like 

Mel: the, Well, it wasn't the, it was one of the. Okay. It was one of the first American ones.

And we did have like 150, 000 followers. 

Camille: That's ridiculous. I 

Mel: know. And they were like listening to me. Like I would go, go live.

I'd go live from my bedroom as like a sophomore in high school. 

Camille: Um, talking about what? 

Mel: Just them. Um, but, and so I've made these friends and. We were just saying this the other day that like, it's like we have always been friends because from the time that we were 16, or sorry from the time we were like 14 until we today, however old we are, there have been moments in culture that we all can point to and remember, like we were there together.

Mm-Hmm. . So 

Mel: like there are times where we'll be like, oh my God, do you remember that night on Twitter? Where. A girl posted a photo of Zayn in a hotel room, and then it's like, oh my god, yes. Or we'll, we'll have inside jokes because we'll say something to each other, like a specific sentence that went viral that one of them said in an interview.

So it's like, these friends I've met, suddenly we have like, A decade of inside jokes. All this history and so many nights spent on the same internet Watching the same things and same videos as they were coming out. Um So yeah another long winded answer 

Camille: No, that's so good though Because I think it was a really clear example of like the shared experience like how it comes into your relationship now It makes sense And for when I 

Mel: backtrack.

Camille: Yeah, I'm curious. Okay, 

Mel: so I think a lot of times I will lose trust or like, um, that idea of, Oh, maybe we could be friends with someone if I watch them lie to someone. Oh, yeah. And I think it's like, It's different if it's like we both did something and we have to get ourselves out of this hole. And it's like, we're not trying to hurt anybody in the process.

But if like, we have this plan, we run into someone, and I watch them, like, I'm pretty passive in those situations. I'm very much like, oh yeah, anybody should come. 

That would be so fun if we all went. I have a really hard time seeing value in like, Well, I think we should just do it. 

I 

Mel: do see so much value in that, but I don't see the difference in like, but if they come, we're still hanging out.

Right. Um, I think that's just being one of four girls. It was like, yeah, we're all coming. There's always multiple. Yeah. What are you talking about? Um, so I think when I watch someone lie to someone, just kind of gauging how easy it is or when we walk away from them, if they don't feel bad, I'm very turned off to somebody that doesn't have empathy or doesn't, like if, if that happens, we walk away and then it's like, I feel so bad that I did that.

Then I'm like, Oh, we're good. We're good. Yeah. No, I'm like, I feel bad too. But sometimes you have to lie.

But then if they like just lied, it's easy to them. They don't care. It's like, Oh my God, the foundation here is cracked because I don't trust you now. 

And now 

Mel: I'm always going to wonder, if you run into me with someone else, Is that gonna be the same thing? Um, so that's kind of hard if it's a lie and then it's not addressed later.

I also have a hard time when somebody like something I had I told you about my boss like or someone that I work with When they say something that I think is just like, so offensive, or harmful, or ignorant. And I'm fully, I don't really believe in cancel culture, I believe in consequences. And I think that even with consequences, you should let people learn and change and listen and learn and write my notes apopology, like, sure.

You should let people have that opportunity to speak because there's so many things that We said we were younger that we don't know how offensive they are until now. I just can't um, and so I think when I hear somebody in 2024 kind of say things that are fairly ignorant or harmful and not really have remorse.

I think a lot of it is tied to remorse for me because it's all tied to being an empathetic person but when I don't see empathy in someone and it feels like they don't necessarily have an understanding of other people or people that are different than them.

Then I'm like, I don't trust you. And the wall is up, the wall is being built as we speak. Um, it's hard. And the, I don't think there's any way to like backtrack. A relationship you've already built with someone, but I very much am like, time. Mm hmm, distance. Mm hmm. Yeah. So it's like, just the time, you know, trying to find another friend, or like, someone, think about something else you can do, and let time pass, and kind of let the natural separation happen with the progression of time, versus, I'm breaking up with you.

Yeah, because you lied. I saw yeah, I didn't think you felt bad and you didn't feel bad. All you had to do is feel bad about it and I would have been 

Camille: right there with you. Yeah. 

Mel: Um, feel bad and have a sister. 

Camille: That's it. Yeah. 

Mel: If I'm not saying you're anxious, we're gonna have nothing to talk about.

What's the funny? 

Camille: Um, okay. I also, I want to know. Having you have been at different levels of the company at this point where it's like Extra entry level of kind of floater level, but then also like okay I'm a permanent assistant and then also coordinator and then also creative exec so I know you mentioned wanting to Or it's kind of safe to build a relationship at your level.

Yeah But do you feel like it's been easier or harder at either of those levels to do that? 

Mel: Um, 

Camille: or any of those levels? Yeah, 

Mel: I think uh I think at this level i'm most comfortable like i've never been more comfortable with like sending a cold email 

um, 

Mel: I think it's easier because um, I'm a lot more confident in everything that I've done so far.

I take a lot of pride in my resume and experience, so I think that every time I build on that or have something else to put under my belt, it just kind of raises my confidence as far as reaching out or hanging out with someone. Um, so yeah, I think now. Um, Just because as an assistant, I was always so scared of doing that.

Um, it's really easy to network within your level, but I always had a hard time, going up, um, until this past job. Because now it's like, I have so much autonomy with my schedule too, that I'm able to go out to lunch or coffee most days. Um, and I have, I'm not like poor. I mean, I'm not, I mean, I'm still probably poor by like LA standards, but, um, having like more money and the time to go do that.

I feel so much more comfortable than when I'd be like, okay, let's see if this goes through. Right. But I had to go to this dinner. Right. So, um, yeah, I would say now

Camille: that's it. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah. Honestly. Cause I think. Yeah, the flexibility and money for sure. But also I definitely get in my head about like, well, I don't really have anything to contribute. Yeah. Why would they want to talk to me? Yeah. And then I feel like there's so much pressure when you do get a meeting with someone higher up to make it like perfect.

Cause you're like, they need to be impressed by me. I need to ask the exact right question. Who knows what this could lead to? Like there's so much extra stress on it. Which. I have added myself, but like, I do think it's kind of real. And I think people get coached that way as well. Like, if you get time, you better make it worth it.

Totally. And don't waste their time and stuff, so. 

Mel: I also think that being a streamer helped too, because of the name recognition. Being tied to a company, or when I worked for an actress, like being tied to her and her company. Sometimes I would feel a little bit more confident, because I'd be like, What I have to give them is insight from this actress or this streamer that they wouldn't have otherwise.

Mm hmm. So, oh, trying to focus on what, when you say like, what can I contribute, like what you're tied to.

Camille: Kind of similar. Do you, are you usually one of one? Or are there usually people like on your teams or nearby? Who share your identities? 

Mel: Oh, at work? Yeah. I'm one of one. Okay. In life, I'm one of one.

I'm one of one. As Beyonce would say, um, no, I, at work, I'm the only, um, Latino identifying person. I'm the only woman in the executive staff and I'm the only person of color on the executive. Oh my gosh. Okay. 

Camille: Let's go back to our back to back death situation. Triple whammy! Triple whammy! At least I can be nearby.

Yeah. Okay, that's a lot. Yeah. Okay. Is that like the norm for you? Or is that just right now? Um, 

Mel: I think, 

Camille: right, 

Mel: I mean, my last three jobs, the job before this, I was the only woman of color also. Um, but it was just me, the actress, and her producing partner, so there were three of us, and her personal assistant.

But they were all white women. 

Camille: Yeah, so you're like 25%? Pretty good. Yeah. 

Mel: I was like, you know what? At least they're women. Um, but I'll take what I can get. Yeah. Oh, my chrome dinner. Um And then, uh, at this job, the development team is just me and one other person. And he's a white man, but he's gay. So, take what we can get.

And our assistant is a woman of color. Okay.

But, the comedy scene in general is very white.

And if it's not, it's very male. Um, I've worked with a lot of men of color in comedy. I've worked with some women of color. But, for the most part, in my experience, it's always been with white people. Um, But I think that, while it's a little ostracizing, I do think that the spaces I've been in, I've been particularly lucky where they see the value in my different background.

Camille: Um, 

Mel: specifically at the streamer, I was always asked. That's my opinion and I do feel like both of my bosses were like, your opinion is something that we could never even think about having because it's like, your background, what you bring to the table, my name. There's a lot of 

Camille: That's nice. Nice that they're aware.

Yeah. 

Mel: But I've experienced a weird amount of Attraction to my name. I've been told like you your name would be a great like production company name And i'm like, okay, it's kind of oversaturated. Sanchez? Yeah with Gloria Sanchez, Gary Sanchez We're gonna add Mel Sanchez. You want three? Absolutely not.

It's the table. No seats. Um No, but I've been told, my name is good, like the name Mel Sanchez, like, it sounds like somebody who should be working. Comedy. 

Camille: And I'm like, I don't get that. I'm like, is that encouraging, or are you like, hello? 

Mel: It's, no. It's more like, it's not that it's discouraging, it does feel affirming in that like, I like my name.

Yeah, I never have wanted to change my name. I've always loved that my last name is essentially Smith. Like, I think that's so fun. But I don't know. I, there's been a couple of times where someone has said that to me in different meetings. 

Camille: White people. 

Mel: Yes, of course. White men. Interesting. So, uh, I do think that I'm fortunate in that there's a lot of, like, consideration for, diversity in the comedy space. So, I think I've been lucky

Camille: um, I know you've been at a lot of smaller companies, but have you had any experience? With like employee resource or affinity groups in kind of helping build community where it's not present in your immediate team, especially.

Mel: Um, yeah, I think like when I was at a streamer, they definitely had the best employee resource groups for sure. Um, I think that that was a great thing to kind of go to during the day. If I was like, Oh, I want to like. Go do this. And there'd always, I'd always leave any of those meetings like that with like something positive.

Um, specifically like going to Latino ones, but I also would frequent like black ones too. Because I'd be like, I'm having a bad day, I need to go be in a community, like, I need laughter, I need, I also grew up with a lot of black friends, and so there's something about like, going into black and Latino spaces where I'm immediately like, I'm understood here.

Yeah. Um, and so. I will always think about this moment when I was on a black employee resource groups meeting, and somebody had a hat on that barely fit their head, because they, like, had their hair teased out, and so they put it, like, just at the top of the eye, and somebody, out of the blue, in the chat said, that hat is overworked and underpaid.

And I think about that moment and the moment that he read that comment. And now everybody, like, in the little boxes, you can see everybody read it at the same time. And I was having such a bad day, because it was COVID, it was a lot of like, I'm pretty sure it was like a meeting about George Floyd and like a lot of Protests and Black Lives Matter as a whole and just That moment it was like, oh my god, this is such a good such a good community to be a part of so I think at smaller companies it's harder to find those big organized events.

Camille: Yeah, for sure. When it's like our whole group is three people. 

Mel: Yeah, there's three of us. Our budget is 20. I am the employee resource group. So, like, and I talk to myself enough. I actually am trying to avoid doing that.

So, uh, I think it's definitely harder at small companies. Um, but at this point in my career, I think or I know I've been able to find outside organizations that are either very like woman of color focused or female focused. Um, so yeah, I don't know. I think. The industry is particularly good at championing voices.

I think that it's very slow and it's such a grueling process. It's just absolutely an uphill battle the entire way. But I do think that there's definitely a lot of people that see value in underrepresented groups and. know that there isn't like a cap to the amount of space in the industry. I will never subscribe to that idea of there can only be one.

I mean, other than like the Gary Sanchez, Gloria Sanchez, Mel Sanchez argument, the debate that has been coming up. Uh, but, um, I think that, that, uh, when I'm trying to find like pieces of home, those groups are where I can turn to because it's like, I go into a space that immediately I feel safe because, I'm not the only one that's this way.

Camille: Yeah, there's a shared understanding. Yeah. Anything else you want to add that we haven't discussed yet? Um About networking or friendship or No, I think Uh Or anything. I think 

Mel: I've said it all. I've truly left nothing. Nothing unsaid. Um Yeah, no, I think the biggest thing that I've learned now being in the industry for going on seven years is not to do things that I'm not being my best self at.

You know, there's a level of like shoulder elbow rubbing. What is it? Isn't it like rubbing elbows or bumping shoulders? I don't know. 

Camille: Is it rubbing elbows?

Mel: I think so. There's a level of like playing nice or doing things you don't want to do that you Everybody has to do. That's just part of it. but I think the most valuable thing that I've learned and now that I'm reflecting back on all of this time in the industry is that if I don't see a space that I feel like I am comfortable in, I can create it.

And so, To bring this back to Survivor. No, but like, in watch groups with friends, like any show that I like, if I know a few other people like it, I'll be like, oh, let's all watch it together. Like tonight I'm going to a Bravo watch group. Nice. For the season premiere of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Um, so, I think that there are so many ways that you can find those things or create those things just by mentioning them. Like literally just by, I think me saying, I love Survivor, I love reality TV, at work is not necessarily giving anybody, um, too much about myself personally, but it does give me an opportunity.

Where then someone at work could be like, Oh, my friend does this. Or did you know that on Thursdays at this bar, there's this. And so just always trying to talk about things that you like or communities that you want to be a part of, because you can't, no one can fill those of your needs that you did not let show.

Um, it's true. And so just being honest about what you want and what you need. It's a type of manifestation. Yeah. Just being like, I need a Bravo watch group. And now I got invited to one. And here it is. Yeah. So, um, yeah, I don't know. And I think it's not worth it to put yourself in situations where you're unhappy.

Because then you're not going to do your best work. 

Camille: Yeah. That's true. Okay, last question. Okay. That I'm asking everyone at the end of this, their episode this season. Uh 

Mel: huh. 

Camille: What keeps you up at night? Industry. Girl. Or otherwise. 

Mel: What doesn't? Insomnia.

Camille: Okay, but for real, I met someone who had insomnia, and I didn't realize. How bad it was. It's so bad. Because I was like, this is awesome. You don't have to sleep. You can do everything you want at night. Your day is longer. Yeah. I didn't realize it was like, you want, you're so tired, like, but you just can't sleep.

Yeah. That's a form of torture. 

Mel: It really is. Like, I will just lie awake as tired as I've ever been. And I'm like, Nothing happens. 

Camille: Terrible. 

Mel: What I did learn recently is that if your eyes are closed and you're laying down, your body is recharging, even if your mind isn't. Um. So. There's something. That's it, though.

There's 

no other benefit. 

Camille: We'll take it. 

Mel: Yeah. 

Camille: We'll take a week again. Once again, we'll take a week again. 

Mel: Yeah, insomnia, unfortunately. Working on it. Working on it. Um, well thank you for being here. Bye! I feel so lucky. Aw, I feel lucky. Thank you. you. Yeah. So much fun. Everybody go follow Camille on Instagram. It's my show.

I'm gonna leave all of her stuff in the bio.

Camille: Oh my gosh. Um, 

Mel: yeah. So much fun. Thank you. Thank you. This is such a good space that you are providing people with. 

Camille: I hope. 

Mel: It is. It is. Go Camille. 

Camille: Thanks for listening to my conversation with Mel. If you want to keep up with her, you can find her social media accounts in the show notes.

Please subscribe to the show anywhere you get your podcasts and leave a review to let me know what you think. You can also get updates on guests, episode releases, and more by following the show on Instagram at hold the door pod. 

I'll be back next week with an episode about activism in the workplace. See you then